My Magickal Hiatus May 6th – May 26

Okay so, maybe I won’t be having much of a vacation this summer, but I do plan on turning my frustrations into love. ❤

So, as of around May 6th I stopped doing magick.

Well, to be specific,  I decided that I would avoid doing magick for matters that involved my own personal materialistic gain. Instead, I am focusing my attention on getting as close to the divine unity as I possibly can. Here’s the conversation that I have had with non-magickal practioners (of any religious denomination) about the matter:

“Good job! Way to give your life over to the Lord.”

…and from other magickal practioners of any magickal paradigm:

“You *really* sold out to [insert assumption of religious identity usually associated with Judaism, Christianity or Islam here]?” {judgmental glare}

Well here’s a lovely curve ball for both extremes. I learned 5 lessons off the bat from NOT practicing magic as I normally do.

  1. EVERYTHING is magic. If you can concentrate while building something for someone and give it to them, that is magic. I just so happen to have creative inclinations, so practically everything has a charge. I genuinely can’t help it.
  2. My needs are met regardless. There are a number of ignorant mundane zealots who view any magical gesture geared towards a certain goal as being “unfair,” as if hard work isn’t involved. I’ll ignore the latter half of their argument that one can do magic without lifting a finger in the real world, and I want to address the fairness aspect. First of all, I don’t judge you for being able to make your own–anything–by McGuyvering the laws of physics in ways that I cannot to repair your car, headphones, or whatever so you don’t have to pay extra cash. Being a magical practioner with occult knowledge is very similar: I studied hard, and I know how to appeal to the unseen powers that be to get things done in certain ways. Secondly, even in forgoing doing magic for my own sake, by relying on the divine source, everything is accounted for: housing, shelter, food, everything. Even self esteem and psychological matters are accounted for. Everything is addressed and in perfect balance, I can literally rest easy primarily because I have always had a connection with the divine. My goal now is just to learn how to trust.
  3. I am understanding and building my relationship by using what “blasphemous and ungodly” techniques I already know. I can figure out where I need to go, obtain any message that I need to obtain, with simple divinatory know how, meditation, and an open heart. Bibliomancy has been my close friend, and bouncing between the Bible and the Quran has been very interesting given the different voices the voice of the Divine assumes between the two texts. I can meditate and get a gist of why certain things are happening. I can pray and concerns are answered because I learned so many avenues to listening. I know insecurity is part of the ride, but I place my trust in the one I am reaching, and I have only received signs that I am accepted by the divine. Granted, that still doesn’t stop the haters.
  4. Both the mage and the religious conservative can be self important, stuck up, and controlling d***s. I’m completely surprised, honestly. On both sides of the fence I have had my identity questioned. I’ve straight up had to do some toe to toe spiritual battling with someone I thought was going to be a guide for me but instead tried to tell me I was supposed to be under his authority…more on that in a later post. I had to suffer duplicity in one magical group I was a part of (which I left of my own volition). Granted, both experiences were humbling in their own ways, but at the same time, I spent a lot of emotional energy that I probably won’t get back.
  5. My mind is a lot clearer. At first, I found myself feeling very anxious, and I had cast a spell to cheer myself up out of habit. Even restraining oneself from practicing magic is a form of fasting, a form of meditation. As time passed, I noticed tensions begin to fall off and my shoulders and heart become lighter. I don’t quite know how, but I think I had a lot of things on autopilot, and I didn’t even realize it. Now, I live in the present more than I did before.

I’ll probably be posting just a little more often than I normally do, but my message for you peeps doing something off beat: just do your thing. Earlier this year I already new that I was doomed to be hated because I had no singular artificial religious or spiritual identity. Magician is the only thing that I can be rationally called, but I’ve gotten heat from both sides, the occultists and the religious, but I’m where I am so I can fight for both when it’s needed. Go ahead and go against the grain, especially if you are certain its the right way to go. Be courageous and don’t let anyone phase you!

You’ve got this!

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